Funny

I may have been reading books / listening to audiobooks and playing podcasts about wellness and self-improvement lately, but there's still that snarky younger version of myself inside of me. She's only just gotten the wheel (see previous blog posts). I'm gonna let her be petty about some shit that doesn't matter in the grand scheme. Nobody's perfect.

This may or may not be quick, jolting and/or disjointed
Just a random thought that I've had on and off throughout the eternity of meeting people. 

These people.
These people who are convinced they are the "funny friend". 
There are many breeds of these people. But the type I would like to type about today is as follows:

(Their inner monologue, probably:) I watched many movies and shows in the 80s / 90s / 00s and memorized what line was said right before the studio audience laughed and now I say those lines all the time through almost random intervals - and certainly when I feel as though others are not paying enough attention to me - and wait for the sound of the studio audience. If I memorize what the clever character said when all the other characters realized how clever they were, I will obviously then be just as clever. I am also armed with an arsenal of lines from well-known media that I can say to the other person/people around me and sometimes they will laugh. And I will allow myself not to realize that this second tactic is not actually the result of humor, but of nostalgia. As well as, maybe, the other person/people congratulating themselves that they remembered a quote from somewhere. Regardless of which approach I take to "humor", I am absolutely hilarious and therefore very fun to be around and also I will continue to spam the living shit out of the tiny rolodex of quotes that I have accumulated until I die. Ooh, maybe I'll pick up a few new ones from a facebook post/video!

If this doesn't make sense to you: congratulations! You probably haven't been driven mad by these (probably) completely harmless people. You have likely risen above the tediousness that is being irritated by them. I haven't. I don't know that I ever will. We're not there yet. 

Either that or you are this person. No further comment. Okay, maybe: READ A BOOK AND FIND YOUR DNA.

For those of us who are also stupidly petty about this: this type of person's origin is just a centimeter away from one that I have roots in. I was younger: watched the media / intook the quotes / did impressions of Ace Ventura... the whole nine! But at some point, my frontal lobe developed and I realized a few things. There are, for example, ways to apply some quotes in a way that is fewer/farther between and actually clever/appropriate. One where yes, you are relying on someone else's line, but you are repurposing it in a way that is inherently your own. Additionally: there are certainly people (one person in particular / my bff) who I quote nostalgic shit with/at all the time. We both enjoy, we both laugh and kick our little feet and then we return to our own personalities and proceed with the conversation. 

There are funny people in my life. These funny people are funniest when they are not quoting something. When they are being authentically themselves, or even throwing in theatrics, but in a way that is very them. 

I know. I need to get a life. But as an incredibly gifted, hilarious and authentic person myself: it just really gets to me. (Somebody out there just said "AND HUMBLE, TOO HAHAH" and completely ruined my joke. Because they are idiots and do not understand nuance/subtlety/jokes. So they struggle their short little leggies in the pool of humor to try their best to capitalize on this totally serious thing I just said.
These people are the worst.
And must die.)